Surgeon: Doctor Tittensore 2-9-16

The next day I visited my surgeon.  Dr. Tittensore.  Yes that is her name and she only does breast surgery.  We have had a good laugh about it.  She scheduled surgery for the next week.  She went through everything and told me all the stats on everything.  My choices were:

1.  Lumpectomy
     Positives:  You still have breasts.  Maybe won't need Chemo
     Negatives:  Automatic Radiation, if they find cancer you will need to get breast removed,     Mammograms, Being scared. 
2.  Take off the Breast with the cancer
      Positives:  No Mammogram in this breast, no cancer in this breast, new breasts, no being scared, better chance of not getting radiation.
      Negatives:  Yucky fake boob.  Not looking symmetrical, no breast
3.  Take off both Breasts
      Positives:  No Mammograms ever, no cancer will ever be found in either breast, new breasts, no being scared, better chance of not getting radiation.  Better chance of living and not getting cancer back.
      Negatives:  No real breasts.

At this time it was believed that I was Stage 1.  I was told to think about it and I could let them know in a few days.  I told them I would make my decision in the morning.  So we came home and I went to the temple.  After much prayer and thinking in the temple (I was one of the last ones out) Rob and I made a plan.  I was given lots of different options and plans and if you do this, then we will do this- choices.  It was so confusing and so frustrating.  I was so overwhelmed.  So finally I went to the temple (by myself-Rob was sick).  I had a long wait in initiatory.  At first I wanted a private place to cry and be overwhelmed.  I didn’t want to sit by the other ladies and have them see my pain in  my face.  As I sat there I started pleading with Heavenly Father to tell me what to do.  After about 10 minutes of getting no where, I realized I needed to make a decision first and then come to him.  I thought about all my options and it boiled down to that I want the best chance for a long happy life with my family.  That meant removing both breasts.  So I prayed about that.  Within minutes I felt the calm and peace that I have been seeking.  I knew that was the path to take.  So here was the plan:  On Feb. 19^th surgery.  I will stay in the hospital for two days.  It will be a 6-8 week recovery.  Hopefully even if I can only walk down to the stop sign, I will be able to do my walking faster than that.  Walking is my therapy!  I will be getting genetic testing this week to see if this will affect my sisters and daughter.  I will get a sonogram of both sides to see if there is anymore cancer.  I will be doing reconstructive surgery at the time as well.  That will require another surgery in the future.